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From: ::darkshadows::
Newsgroups: alt.fan.smeagol
Subject: Re: LIFESPAN DEVELOPMENT
Date: Tue, 10 Oct 2006 14:58:33 -0500
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On Tue, 10 Oct 2006 14:12:51 GMT, WingedMessenger <Boy@Flying.high>
wrote:
>::darkshadows:: wrote in news:9s5ni25hh4eutfsolbrri1kmnahddemg50@4ax.com:
>
>>
>> LIFESPAN DEVELOPMENT
>>
>>
>>
>> GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT LIFE THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED
>>
>> 1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.
>> 2) When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.
>> 3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the
>> second person.
>> 4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
>> 5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
>> 6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
>> 7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.
>> 8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
>> 9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
>> 10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandma's lap.
>
>(1) A bucket of water gets without the sods easily.
>(9) Go on, spoil my dress sense.
You got sense?
>(10) At my age!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>>
>>
>> GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT LIFE THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:
>>
>> 1) Raising teenagers is like nailing Jell-O to a tree.
>> 2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
>> 3) Families are like fudge . . . mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
>> 4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
>> 5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.
>> 6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the
>> joy.
>
>(2) Only if you are female and fill them full of polyfil.
>(4) Very true, I am proof of that LOL.
Some might argue that you are still the nut who too senile to know any
better.
>
>>
>>
>> GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD
>>
>> 1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
>> 2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
>> 3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're
>> down there.
>> 4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking
>> chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
>> 5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers
>> to ask you the questions.
>> 6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
>> 7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.
>
>(1) yep.
You give up too easily
>(2) Not at the stage of injecting formaldehyde yet!!!!!
Bend over for your shot.
>(3) Never been on a roller coaster, its for the brain dead.
Speaking from experience?
>(6) Well its done wonders for me!!!!!
That's a matter of opinion.
>(7) Yes, but modesty forbids me from saying more LOL.
Never stopped you before
>
>>
>>
>> THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:
>>
>> 1) You believe in Santa Claus.
>> 2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
>> 3) You are Santa Claus.
>> 4) You look like Santa Claus.
>
>(3) More truth in this than you think.
>>
>>
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