::darkshadows:: wrote in news:9s5ni25hh4eutfsolbrri1kmnahddemg50@4ax.com:
>
> LIFESPAN DEVELOPMENT
>
>
>
> GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT LIFE THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED
>
> 1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.
> 2) When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.
> 3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the
> second person.
> 4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
> 5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
> 6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
> 7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.
> 8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
> 9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
> 10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandma's lap.
(1) A bucket of water gets without the sods easily.
(9) Go on, spoil my dress sense.
(10) At my age!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>
>
> GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT LIFE THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:
>
> 1) Raising teenagers is like nailing Jell-O to a tree.
> 2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
> 3) Families are like fudge . . . mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
> 4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
> 5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.
> 6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the
> joy.
(2) Only if you are female and fill them full of polyfil.
(4) Very true, I am proof of that LOL.
>
>
> GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD
>
> 1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
> 2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
> 3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're
> down there.
> 4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking
> chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
> 5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers
> to ask you the questions.
> 6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
> 7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.
(1) yep.
(2) Not at the stage of injecting formaldehyde yet!!!!!
(3) Never been on a roller coaster, its for the brain dead.
(6) Well its done wonders for me!!!!!
(7) Yes, but modesty forbids me from saying more LOL.
>
>
> THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:
>
> 1) You believe in Santa Claus.
> 2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
> 3) You are Santa Claus.
> 4) You look like Santa Claus.
(3) More truth in this than you think.
>
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