On Sun, 16 Oct 2005 00:43:59 -0400, "::Y-Not::" <$9+-Y-Not@here.com> wrote:
>In article <jhf2l158tq3m8p3hcrb7is1u05mdu5kes3@4ax.com>, Lil Stinker
>NP-g07 <anywhere@uwant2.com> wrote:
>
>> Vatican City - The Catholic church announced its formal policy today to
>> ensure that there are no longer any gay priests within the world's
>> largest christian denomination. The policy is surprising to many and is
>> believed to be the church's latest response to the pedophelia scandal.
>> Vatican Spokesman Lytin Hyslofers described the rationale behind the
>> new policy, "We were considering the direction of the church in the
>> twenty-first century. We had the grave all picked out, with a lovely
>> headstone, and a very elaborate coffin. And then someone said, 'hey,
>> we could use a few more nails for this thing'."
>>
>> The policy was further explained by Cardinal Inntha Klawsett, "We
>> looked at all the serious studies showing that pedophelia is not linked
>> to sexual orientation and most likely derives from whichever children
>> the perpetrator has access too. We also read all the studies that most
>> pedophiles identify themselves as heterosexual. Then we said,'Hey,
>> we're the guys who told Galileo the sun revolved around the earth. Are
>> we gonna go with facts when we have blind ignorance and prejudice to
>> get us through'."
>>
>> The cardinal in charge of the church's new "straight agenda" Monsignor
>> Torr Kemawda described how the policy would be enforced, "We're going
>> to go around to each and every parish and look for scientifically
>> acceptable signs of gayness such as; Priests whose shoes match their
>> vestments, Lenten banners that look just a little too colorful, incense
>> that smells too pretty, choirs that have great harmony, all the
>> telltale signs of an insidious gayness. If that occurs, we'll do an
>> 'exorcism' which is top secret but will involve a keg of beer and a big
>> screen TV showing football in the sacristy. As to the priests, they'll
>> be expelled and excommunicated, not transferred, this gayness thing is
>> serious, unlike good old fashioned pedophelia."
>>
>> The Vatican was unavailable for further comment after the policy was
>> announced, as it appeared to be empty.
>>
>> Lil Stinker
>> "just havin' fun!"
>
>
>Oh this is bad! REALLY bad.
>
>But in a terrifically good way. :-)
>
>
>I'll be sending you an email about the goings on in another group, that
>you might enjoy watching. See if you can see, that we see they don't
>see, because they are at sea, what the "slam dunk is". :-)
>
>
>Take care,
>
>
>Y Not
I shall be waiting....with baited breath.
I think that's the saying?
Lil Stinker
"just havin' fun!"
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