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"Bill Cleer wrote:
=20
> From: bcleere@pyrtech.mis.pyramid.com (Bill Cleere)
> Subject: My Near-Death Experience
> Date: 1996/04/19
> Message-ID: <4l9nuc$28t@pyrtech.mis.pyramid.com>
> organization: Pyramid Technology
> newsgroups: alt.consciousness.near-death-exp
> This being the sixth anniversary of the beginning of my near-death
> experience, I thought I might exorcise a little melancholy by
> sharing it here. Be warned--it's not very exciting compared to
> others I've heard of, and I was on enough drugs at the time to
> be unable to decide what was "real", what was drug-induced, or
> even if those two questions are ultimately of any use.
> Sometimes, shortly after it was over, I felt like a character in some
> movie who was asked if he had any spiritual revelations while
> almost dying; he answered, "I didn't see JACK! Not a Godamn thing."
> I didn't see much, but, for what little use it may be to he honest
> seekers on this group, here goes:
> I woke up one morning feeling a little out of sorts--no pain or
> discomfort or feeling of impending doom, just a sort of "got up on
> the wrong side of the bed" thing. While taking a shower, I started
> coughing up blood. First a little, building up within a few minutes
> to a half-cupful with each cough (the shower looked like something
> out of "Pyscho"). I had absolutely no pain and was clear-headed
> though terribly scared. I made a snap decision that I could drive
> to the hospital faster than call an ambulance. That was very
> dumb, but I made it. When I got to the ER I'd stopped coughing,
> so they actually made me wait with the twisted ankles and such.
>=20
> Finally, a doctor checked me and said they would need to "put me
> under" and see what was going on. I woke up ten days later.
> What had happened was that a congenitally malformed vein had burst
> in my lung. It could have happened for no reason or could have
> been agitated by stress (I was under huge stress at the time, but
> that's another story) or by a fall from a ladder a few months
> earlier.
Well Bill, stuff happens. Once it has happened
we ride it out the best we can, don't we?
> While I was "out" I nearly died several times (106 degree fever,
> pneumonia, etc.) At one point the nurses told my wife "he
> probably won't last the night" and she brought in my sons and
> my sister-in-law and asked the Catholic chaplain to perform the
> Last Rites.
Geez, these guys are so helpful.
> As my wife tells it, the priest at one point told them all they
> had to "let him [me] go". My sister-in-law said "NO--I won't let
> him go" very loudly.
Sister(s)-in-law can be alot like mothers-in-law.
> OK, here's the NDE. I remember at one point "dreaming" that I
> was on the bridge of a Star Trek-like spaceship, just standing
> around watching the crew doing their stuff at their consoles.
Hospital oriented. A true spaceship with no wings.
> There were some doors along the wall, and I realized, in a very
> matter-of-fact way, that one of them led to an area of
> beautiful light. I was drawn to it, but before I could go
> through it, I was distracted by my sister-in-law, whom I had
> not noticed was on the bridge, saying something very loud. I
> love her dearly, but she does irritate me sometimes by being
> really loud in public, and I said something to the effect of
> "Margy--hold it down a little, will you?" In the process,
> I forgot about the door, and I guess the "dream" ended there.
The door that leads to infinity. So close 'and yet'
so far away. Don't worry you'll get another shot at it.
No hurry. "We all have it coming." {clint eastwood voice}
> Well, there you have it. Not exactly material for the
> Penguin Book of Great Spiritual Experiences. I hope it may
> be of some slight use to someone.
It's honest, it's a direct experience. Fuck Penguin Books.
> Oh, incidentally, I hope all of you who are trying to understand
> more about these matters will not neglect the work of William
> James, that great adventurer in the spiritual world.
I'd bring out a Ram Dass quote from old Bill (William James)
but I'm too lazy. Besides I've quoted enough crap today already.
> Godspeed you all in your own voyages.
Likewise. It ain't over even when it seems like it's over. :)
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<DIV><FONT face=3DArial size=3D2><FONT face=3D"Comic Sans =
MS"><STRONG>"Bill Cleer=20
wrote</STRONG></FONT>:</FONT></DIV>
<DIV><FONT face=3DArial size=3D2> <BR>> From: </FONT><A=20
href=3D"mailto:bcleere@pyrtech.mis.pyramid.com"><FONT face=3DArial=20
size=3D2>bcleere@pyrtech.mis.pyramid.com</FONT></A><FONT face=3DArial =
size=3D2> (Bill=20
Cleere)<BR>> Subject: My Near-Death Experience<BR>> Date:=20
1996/04/19<BR>> Message-ID: <</FONT><A=20
href=3D"mailto:4l9nuc$28t@pyrtech.mis.pyramid.com"><FONT face=3DArial=20
size=3D2>4l9nuc$28t@pyrtech.mis.pyramid.com</FONT></A><FONT face=3DArial =
size=3D2>><BR>> organization: Pyramid Technology<BR>> =
newsgroups:=20
alt.consciousness.near-death-exp<BR><BR>> This being the sixth =
anniversary of=20
the beginning of my near-death<BR>> experience, I thought I might =
exorcise a=20
little melancholy by<BR>> sharing it here. Be warned--it's not =
very=20
exciting compared to<BR>> others I've heard of, and I was on enough =
drugs at=20
the time to<BR>> be unable to decide what was "real", what was =
drug-induced,=20
or<BR>> even if those two questions are ultimately of any =
use.<BR>>=20
Sometimes, shortly after it was over, I felt like a character in =
some<BR>>=20
movie who was asked if he had any spiritual revelations while<BR>> =
almost=20
dying; he answered, "I didn't see JACK! Not a Godamn =
thing."<BR>> I=20
didn't see much, but, for what little use it may be to he honest<BR>> =
seekers=20
on this group, here goes:<BR><BR>> I woke up one morning feeling a =
little out=20
of sorts--no pain or<BR>> discomfort or feeling of impending doom, =
just a=20
sort of "got up on<BR>> the wrong side of the bed" thing. While =
taking=20
a shower, I started<BR>> coughing up blood. First a little, =
building up=20
within a few minutes<BR>> to a half-cupful with each cough (the =
shower looked=20
like something<BR>> out of "Pyscho"). I had absolutely no pain =
and was=20
clear-headed<BR>> though terribly scared. I made a snap =
decision that I=20
could drive<BR>> to the hospital faster than call an ambulance. =
That=20
was very<BR>> dumb, but I made it. When I got to the ER I'd =
stopped=20
coughing,<BR>> so they actually made me wait with the twisted ankles =
and=20
such.<BR>> <BR>> Finally, a doctor checked me and said they would =
need to=20
"put me<BR>> under" and see what was going on. I woke up ten =
days=20
later.<BR>> What had happened was that a congenitally malformed vein =
had=20
burst<BR>> in my lung. It could have happened for no reason or =
could=20
have<BR>> been agitated by stress (I was under huge stress at the =
time,=20
but<BR>> that's another story) or by a fall from a ladder a few=20
months<BR>> earlier.</FONT></DIV>
<DIV><FONT face=3DArial size=3D2></FONT> </DIV>
<DIV><FONT face=3DArial></FONT><STRONG><FONT face=3D"Comic Sans MS" =
size=3D2>Well=20
Bill, stuff happens. Once it has =
happened</FONT></STRONG></DIV>
<DIV><STRONG><FONT face=3D"Comic Sans MS" size=3D2>we ride it out the =
best we can,=20
don't we?</FONT></STRONG></DIV>
<DIV><STRONG><FONT face=3D"Comic Sans MS" =
size=3D2></FONT></STRONG> </DIV>
<DIV><BR><FONT face=3DArial size=3D2>> While I was "out" I nearly =
died several=20
times (106 degree fever,<BR>> pneumonia, etc.) At one point the =
nurses=20
told my wife "he<BR>> probably won't last the night" and she brought =
in my=20
sons and<BR>> my sister-in-law and asked the Catholic chaplain to =
perform=20
the<BR>> Last Rites.<BR></FONT></DIV>
<DIV><FONT face=3DArial size=3D2></FONT> </DIV>
<DIV><FONT face=3DArial size=3D2><STRONG><FONT face=3D"Comic Sans =
MS">Geez, these guys=20
are so helpful.</FONT></STRONG></FONT></DIV>
<DIV><FONT face=3DArial size=3D2><STRONG><FONT=20
face=3D"Comic Sans MS"></FONT></STRONG> </DIV>
<DIV><BR>> As my wife tells it, the priest at one point told them all =
they<BR>> had to "let him [me] go". My sister-in-law said =
"NO--I won't=20
let<BR>> him go" very loudly.<BR></DIV>
<DIV><STRONG><FONT face=3D"Comic Sans MS">Sister(s)-in-law can be alot =
like=20
mothers-in-law.</FONT></STRONG></DIV>
<DIV><BR>> OK, here's the NDE. I remember at one point =
"dreaming" that=20
I<BR>> was on the bridge of a Star Trek-like spaceship, just =
standing<BR>>=20
around watching the crew doing their stuff at their consoles.</DIV>
<DIV> </DIV>
<DIV><STRONG><FONT face=3D"Comic Sans MS">Hospital oriented. =
A true=20
spaceship with no wings.</FONT></STRONG></DIV>
<DIV> </DIV>
<DIV><BR>> There were some doors along the wall, and I realized, in a =
very<BR>> matter-of-fact way, that one of them led to an area =
of<BR>>=20
beautiful light. I was drawn to it, but before I could go<BR>> =
through=20
it, I was distracted by my sister-in-law, whom I had<BR>> not noticed =
was on=20
the bridge, saying something very loud. I<BR>> love her dearly, =
but she=20
does irritate me sometimes by being<BR>> really loud in public, and I =
said=20
something to the effect of<BR>> "Margy--hold it down a little, will=20
you?" In the process,<BR>> I forgot about the door, and I guess =
the=20
"dream" ended there.<BR></DIV>
<DIV><STRONG><FONT face=3D"Comic Sans MS">The door that leads to =
infinity. =20
So close 'and yet'</FONT></STRONG></DIV>
<DIV><STRONG><FONT face=3D"Comic Sans MS">so far away. Don't =
worry=20
you'll get another shot at it.</FONT></STRONG></DIV>
<DIV><STRONG><FONT face=3D"Comic Sans MS">No hurry. "We =
all have=20
it coming." {clint eastwood voice}</FONT></STRONG></DIV>
<DIV><BR>> Well, there you have it. Not exactly material for=20
the<BR>> Penguin Book of Great Spiritual Experiences. I hope it =
may<BR>> be of some slight use to someone.<BR></DIV>
<DIV><FONT face=3D"Comic Sans MS"><STRONG>It's honest, it's a direct=20
experience. Fuck Penguin Books.</STRONG></FONT></DIV>
<DIV><BR>> Oh, incidentally, I hope all of you who are trying to=20
understand<BR>> more about these matters will not neglect the work of =
William<BR>> James, that great adventurer in the spiritual =
world.<BR></DIV>
<DIV><STRONG>I'd bring out a Ram Dass quote from old Bill (William=20
James)</STRONG></DIV>
<DIV><STRONG>but I'm too lazy. Besides I've quoted enough =
crap today=20
already.</STRONG></DIV>
<DIV> </DIV>
<DIV>> Godspeed you all in your own voyages.<BR></DIV>
<DIV><STRONG>Likewise. It ain't over even when it seems like =
it's=20
over. :)</STRONG></DIV></FONT></BODY></HTML>
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