070817A
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The silence of the sky
is what overwhelms us.
It made us,
what we have become.
Beggars begging
for sunlight and rain.
Our hatreds are born
out of our loneliness.
That stigma
to be carried in silence.
The silence of the hunter
and of the hunter's prey.
As prey made afraid
of being wanted.
Every trap is open
waiting to close in on us.
We dread being taken in
by our own hunger.
It is easier to be had
than it is to have anything.
So many ways to be looted
in the name of love.
Taught that what comes cheap
never has any value.
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070817B
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In the new world we came to
the already perished
had to write their own eulogies.
There was no way to discern
the living from the dead,
pressed between history's pages.
Every chorus of “I love you”,
has that hollow sound
that characterizes Greek tragedies.
It was only another lesson
in something like consumer safety
that had to be internalized.
There are separation papers
for anything imaginable,
in with the shipping documents.
Separating from the tokens
of fantasies of affection,
pertaining to persons unknown.
That is as close as we ever come,
to any claims to satisfaction,
by any means, anywhere.
Exactly as the party boss said
when it call came down,
and everyone went to being alone.
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070817C
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Learning that dreams cost money
and the only dreams worth having
are the ones that cost the most money.
Otherwise there is no real escape,
and it is no better than treading water
at the shipwreck of Forever.
Virtual reality is the candy commercial,
watched when all the stores are closed.
You can taste the desire in your mouth.
You never could get what you came for,
but there are other types of rewards
that keep you tuned in and hopeful.
Finding that your love is only a liability,
not worth a plug nickel,
to whomever you can feel it for.
Something that must be given up
under one or another pretension
conveniently labelled as maturity.
It never comes to real negotiations
as to any type of reasonable settlement.
Your character in the game taking damage
until you run out of points.
Then you look for the missing reset button,
wanting to restart the game.
People are only interested in you
talking about yourself
if you are exactly like themselves.
They tend to rule out the exceptional,
unless there is a reward,
as to wanted alive or dead.
Tombstone was a more civil place,
except for the gun fights.
They all had complicated personalities
that they dared to express.
Unlike the people that you get to know,
in the present tense of reality.
Told that the answer is in yourself
you know that you will never find it.
You sent in search parties,
and none of them ever returned.
Perhaps if you had posted a reward,
someone would have.
Almost everyone is playing make believe
as to pretending they are perfectly happy.
The fact that no one who needs them
is anyone whom they want to know.
You call into that category
of the endlessly excluded middle.
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070817D
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Various trap line encounters,
that try to bait your insignificance.
Pavlov has you salivating
as one of his dogs.
You jump when the bell rings,
but it is really only Happy Hour.
You are old enough to know better,
but never rich enough to know how.
Always in the wrong crowd,
failing to share the same obsessions.
You gave up long ago,
but know you have to keep trying.
It is if your culture has died out,
remnants being appropriated
by various estranged others.
You have become the last of your kind,
being a curiosity viewed from a distance
assuming you might prove dangerous.
That feeling of no longer belonging
in any of the places that you used to go,
makes you ghost in and out.
The time ran out long ago,
but nothing you could to to stop it,
and it made you foolish for trying.
Grasping at beliefs as if they are straws,
and always coming up short.
It is a problem integral to the design,
whether it is theirs or yours.
Nothing really meeting base criteria
for any sort of form, fit and function.
One size fits all, is a total lie,
but you leave before the fat lady sings.
Besides that you were never a match
made in any sort of heaven
to anyone even half worth the having,
so you cut your losses and retreat.
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