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From: "Uncle Davey" <noway@jose.com>
Newsgroups: alt.fan.uncle-davey
Subject: Re: My 'girlfriend' just got engaged?
Date: Sun, 3 Aug 2003 17:39:55 +0200
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Uzytkownik "James Murphy" <jamesmurphy@ananzi.co.za> napisal w wiadomosci
news:5b86bfe9.0308021828.15a93e07@posting.google.com...
> Hi everyone, any relationship experts out there that could shed some
> light on my story below?
>
> I met an incredible girl about three months and asked her out and she
> accepted. We both had a wonderful evening, but the next morning she
> called me to explained that she was actually seeing someone else. This
> other guy is currently living and working at a beach resort about 6
> hours away where she met him whilst working there herself. They
> developed a strong relationship there and dated for about 6 months
> before she left to come back home. He had to stay for another three
> months to finish things up. Over the past two months (whilst he is
> still working there), we have seen each other every weekend and often
> during the weeks as well, slowly building up a very close
> relationship. Although there has been no sexual intimacy (her relgious
> views), we have been very close and intimate in our conversation and
> often hug and cuddle. I told her about a month ago that I was
> developing strong feelings for her and she said that she also felt
> something and that she had never felt like she did. She become very
> emotional for a few days, crying and expressing her confusion for why
> she had these feeling for me. We talked and exchanged romantic text
> messages daily.
>
> Then, she told me that her boyfriend was coming back for a few weeks
> vacation and that we probally shouldnt see much of each other during
> that time. Her excuse for this was that she didnt know how she could
> explain our relationship to him without it sounding like she had
> somehow cheated on him. However, he proposed to her after about a week
> and she accepted. I was a little surprised as I thought she was having
> doubts about him since she had such strong feelings for me. Now that
> he's left again to go back, she wants to see me again and continue our
> 'intimate' friendship. She calls me everyday and tells me that she
> loves me and is very grateful for such a 'friend' etc. I know he will
> be back in 3 months and she is already planning their wedding for
> early next year.
>
> I feel that I cannot continue our friendship since I am developing
> stronger and stronger feelings for her everytime I see her. Since she
> is engaged, I feel like the right thing to do is to break off our
> 'relationship' and let her deal with her emotions. Otherwise I am
> setting myself up for alot of pain when he gets back and we cant see
> each other again. Or is it likely that she deosnt really love this
> man based on the relationship that she has allowed herself to get into
> with me and so I should continue to befriend her and hope that she may
> break off the engagement? Any insight would be greatly appreciated. I
> am so confused!
>
> James.
If I were you I would carry on regardless of her being engaged.
I'm sure he would do the same to you.
Uncle Davey, I know I would.
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