"Rolex" <Rolex@webmaster.com> wrote in
news:xCAyf.76030$Es3.71433@fe03.news.easynews.com:
> A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She
> started her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks they're stupid, stand
> up!"
>
> After a few seconds, Little Davie stood up.
>
> The teacher said, "Do you think you're stupid, Little Davie?"
>
> "No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!"
>
> ****
> Little Davie watched, fascinated, as his mother smoothed cold cream on
> her face. "Why do you do that, mommy?" he asked.
>
> "To make myself beautiful," said his mother, who then began removing the
> cream with a tissue.
>
> "What's the matter?" asked Little Davie. "Giving up?"
>
> ****
> A Sunday School teacher of preschoolers was concerned that his students
> might be a little confused about Jesus Christ because of the Christmas
> season emphasis on His birth. He wanted to make sure they understood
> that the birth of Jesus occurred a long time ago, that He grew up, etc.
> So he asked his class, "Where is Jesus today?"
>
> Steven raised his hand and said, "He's in heaven."
>
> Mary was called on and answered, "He's in my heart."
>
> Little Davie, waving his hand furiously, blurted out, "I know! I know!
> He's in our Bathroom!"
>
> The teacher was completely at a loss for a few very long seconds.
> Finally, he gathered his wits and asked Little Davie how he knew this.
>
> Little Davie said, "Well... every morning, my father gets up, bangs on
> the bathroom door, and yells, "Jesus Christ, are you still in there?!"
>
> ****
> The math teacher saw that little Davie wasn't paying attention in class.
> She called on him and said, "Davie! What are 2 and 4 and 5 and 58?"
>
> Little Davie quickly replied, "NBC, CBS, HBO and the Cartoon Network!"
>
> ****
> Little Davie's kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local
> police station where they saw pictures tacked to a bulletin board of the
>
> 10 most wanted criminals.
>
> One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it really was
> the photo of a wanted person.
>
> "Yes," said the policeman. "The detectives want very badly to capture
> him."
>
> Little Davie asked, "Why didn't you keep him when you took his picture?"
>
> ****
> Little Davie attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his
> father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the
> horse's legs, rump, and chest. After a few minutes, Davie asked, "Dad,
> why are you doing that?"
>
> His father replied, "Because when I'm buying horses, I have to make sure
> that they are healthy and in good shape before I buy."
> Little Davie, looking worried, said, "Dad, I think the Milkman wants to
> buy Mom.
The best one is always the last.
Lil Stinker
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