| Re: Telephone Operators Delimma |
EasyNews, UseNet made Ea .. |
| ::darkshadows:: (blood@thirsty.net) |
2009/01/08 14:31 |
On Thu, 8 Jan 2009 14:55:00 -0500, "Rolex" <rolex@easyweb.com> wrote:
>HELLO OPERATOR
>Actual call center conversations!
>
>Customer: 'I've been calling 700-1000 for two days and can't get
>through;
> can you help?'
>Operator: 'Where did you get that number, sir?'
>Customer: 'It's on the door of your business.'
>Operator: 'Sir, those are the hours that we are open.'
>++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ +++++++++
>Samsung Electronics
>Caller: 'Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?'
>Operator: 'I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking
>about.'
>Caller: 'On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly states
>that I
> need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket
>and
> telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the
> number for Jack?'
>Operator: 'I think it means the telephone plug on the wall.'
>------------------------------ ------------------------------ ----------
>RAC Motoring Services
>Caller: 'Does your European Breakdown Policy cover me when I am
> traveling in Australia?'
>Operator: 'Does the product name give you a clue?'
>------------------------------ ------------------------------ ----------
>Caller (enquiring about legal requirements while traveling in Europe)
>'If I register my car in France, and then take it to England, do I have to
>change the steering wheel to the other side of the car?'
>------------------------------ ------------------------------ ----------
>Directory Enquiries
>Caller: 'I'd like the number of the Argo Fish Bar, please'
>Operator: 'I'm sorry, there's no listing. Are you sure that the spelling is
>correct?'
>Caller: 'Well, it used to be called the Bargo Fish Bar but the 'B' fell
>off.'
>------------------------------ ------------------------------ ----------
>Then there was the caller who asked for a knitwear company in Woven.
>Operator: 'Woven? Are you sure?'
>Caller: 'Yes. That's what it says on the label -- Woven in
>Scotland.'
>------------------------------ ------------------------------ ----------
>On another occasion, a man making heavy breathing sounds from a phone box
>told a worried operator: 'I haven't got a pen, so I'm steaming up the window
>to write the number on.'
>------------------------------ ------------------------------ ----------
>Tech Support: 'I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop.'
>Customer: 'OK.'
>Tech Support: 'Did you get a pop-up menu?'
>Customer: 'No.'
>Tech Support: 'OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?'
>Customer: 'No.'
>Tech Support: 'OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until
>this
> point?'
>Customer: 'Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote
>'click'.'
>------------------------------ ------------------------------ ----------
>Tech Support: 'OK. At the bottom left hand side of your screen, can
> you see the 'OK' button displayed?'
>Customer: 'Wow! How can you see my screen from there?'
>------------------------------ ------------------------------ ----------
>Caller: 'I deleted a file from my PC last week and I just realized that I
>need it. So, if I turn my system clock back two weeks will I get my file
>back again?'
>------------------------------ ------------------------------ ----------
>This has to be one of the funniest things in a long time. I think this guy
>should have been promoted, not fired. This is a true story from the
>WordPerfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the
>customer care department. Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired;
>however, he/she is currently suing the WordPerfect organization for
>'Termination without Cause.'
>
>Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee.
>(Now I know why they record these conversations!):
>
>Operator: 'Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?'
>Caller: 'Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.'
>Operator: 'What sort of trouble??'
>Caller: 'Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the
>words
> went away.'
>Operator: 'Went away?'
>Caller: 'They disappeared'
>Operator: 'Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?'
>Caller: 'Nothing.'
>Operator: 'Nothing??'
>Caller: 'It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type.'
>Operator: 'Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?'
>Caller: 'How do I tell?'
>Operator: 'Can you see the 'C: prompt' on the screen?'
>Caller: 'What's a sea-prompt?'
>Operator: 'Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?'
>Caller: 'There isn't any cursor; I told you, it won't accept
>anything I
> type.'
>Operator: 'Does your monitor have a power indicator??'
>Caller: 'What's a monitor?'
>Operator: 'It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a
>TV.
> Does it have a little light that tells you when
>it's on?'
>Caller: 'I don't know.'
>Operator: 'Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find
>where
> the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??'
>Caller: 'Yes, I think so.'
>Operator: 'Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's
> plugged into the wall.
>Caller: 'Yes, it is.'
>Operator: 'When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that
> there were two cables plugged into the back of it,
>not just
> one? '
>Caller: 'No.'
>Operator: 'Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and
> find the other cable.'
>Caller: 'Okay, here it is.'
>Operator: 'Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely
>into
> the back of your computer.'
>Caller: 'I can't reach.'
>Operator: 'OK. Well, can you see if it is?'
>Caller: 'No.'
>Operator: 'Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean
> way over?'
>Caller: 'Well, it's not because I don't have the right
>angle -- it's
> because it's dark.'
>Operator: 'Dark?'
>Caller: 'Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I
>have is
> coming in from the window.'
>Operator: 'Well, turn on the office light then.'
>Caller: 'I can't.'
>Operator: 'No? Why not?'
>Caller: 'Because there's a power failure.'
>Operator: 'A power .... A power failure ? Aha. Okay, we've got it
> licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals
>and
> packing stuff that your computer came in?'
>Caller: 'Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.'
>Operator: 'Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it
> up just like it was when you got it. Then take it
>back to
> the store you bought it from.'
>Caller: 'Really? Is it that bad?'
>Operator: 'Yes, I'm afraid it is.'
>Caller: 'Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell
>them?'
>Operator: 'Tell them you're too damned stupid to own a computer!
They must have wire tapped Mercury's telephone.
lol,
darkshadows
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