| More Celebrity Quickies |
EasyNews, UseNet made Ea .. |
| ::darkshadows:: (blood@thirsty.net) |
2008/12/15 09:49 |
Steven Spielberg was busy discussing his new action adventure about
famous classical composers. Bruce Willis, Sylvester Stallone and
Arnold Schwarzenegger were in the room. "Who do you want to play?"
Spielberg asked Bruce Willis. "I've always been a big fan of Chopin,"
said Bruce. "I'll play him." "And you, Sylvester?" asked Spielberg.
"Mozart's the one for me!" said Sly. "And what about you?" Spielberg
asked Arnold Schwarzenegger. "I'll be Bach," said Arnie.
Mickey Mouse is having a nasty divorce with Minnie Mouse. Mickey spoke
to the judge about the separation. "I'm sorry Mickey, but I can't
legally separate you two on the grounds that Minnie is mentally
insane..." Mickey replied, "I didn't say she was mentally insane, I
said that she's fucking goofy!"
Q. What do Ethiopians and Yoko Ono have in common?
A. They both live off dead Beatles.
Q. What did Helen Keller do when she fell down the well?
A. She screamed her hands off.
Q. What does McDonald's and Michael Jackson have in common?
A. They both stick their meat in 13 year old buns.
Q. What do you call 5 dogs with no balls?
A. The Spice Girls!
Q. Why does Michael Jackson scream?
A. Because it hurts.
Q: Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?
A: "Feel the World."
Q: Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest song?
A: "Don't let your son go down on me."
Q: What's Michael Jackson's favorite nursery rhyme?
A: Little Boy Blew.
Q: What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?
A: "The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
Q: What did Michael Jackson say when a boy in a car mooned him going
down the road?
A: "I'll be there!"
Q: What is Michael Jackson's favorite gospel song?
A: "And then he touched me"
Q: What did Michael Jackson say to Lorena Bobbit?
A: "SILLY Bobbit! Dicks are for KIDS!"
Q: What do Michael Jackson and Miss Bobbit have in common?
A: They both played with little wieners.
Q: Why did Michael Jackson get food poisoning?
A: He ate a nine year old wiener!
Q: Why did Michael Jackson get kicked out of the school cafeteria?
A: Because he ate all the kids' wieners.
Q: What does Michael Jackson call a circumcision?
A: Foreplay.
Q: What do Michael Jackson and an Xbox have in common?
A: Both get turned on by kids!!!
Q: What do Michael Jackson and Santa Claus have in common?
A: They both leave little boys' rooms with empty sacks.
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