A blonde has been working in a broom factory since childhood, despite
the state's strict anti-child labor laws, and has always been a good
worker. But one day, she storms into her boss' office.
"I quit! That's it, I'm not working here anymore!"
"Why?" asks the boss. "What's the problem?"
"I've been working here for so long that I've grown the broom bristles
between my legs. I can't take it anymore."
"Listen," the boss says. "That's perfectly normal. Look, I have those
too."
"Oh, my God!" she exclaims. "It's worse than I thought! You've also
grown a broom handle!"
=====
In a trans-Atlantic flight, a plane passes through a severe storm. The
turbulence is awful, and things go from bad to worse when one wing is
struck by lightning. One woman in particular loses it. Screaming, she
stands up in the front of the plane. "I'm too young to die!" she
wails.
Then she yells, "Well, if I'm going to die, I want my last minutes on
Earth to be memorable! I've had plenty of sex in my life, but no one
has ever made me really feel like a woman! Well, I've had it! Is there
ANYONE on this plane who can make me feel like a WOMAN??"
For a moment there is silence. Everyone has forgotten their own peril,
and they all stare, riveted, at the desperate woman in the front of
the plane.
Then, a man stands up in the rear of the plane. "I can make you feel
like a woman," he says. He's gorgeous. Tall, built, with flowing black
hair and jet black eyes, he starts to walk slowly up the aisle,
unbuttoning his shirt one button at a time.
No one moves.
The woman is breathing heavily in anticipation as the stranger
approaches. He removes his shirt. Muscles ripple across his chest as
he reaches her, and extends the arm holding his shirt to the trembling
woman, and whispers: "Iron this."
=====
Why did the blonde take a right into the ditch?
Her blinker was on.
=====
A married man was having an affair with his secretary. One day, their
passions overcame them and they took off for her house, where they
made passionate love all afternoon. Exhausted from the wild sex, they
fell asleep and awoke at around 8 p.m. As the man threw on his
clothes, he told the woman to take his shoes outside and rub them
through the grass and dirt. Mystified, she nonetheless complied and he
slipped into his shoes and drove home.
"Where have you been?" demanded his wife when he entered the house.
"Darling," replied the man, "I can't lie to you. I've been having an
affair with my secretary and we've been having sex all afternoon. I
fell asleep and didn't wake up until eight o'clock."
The wife glanced down at his shoes and said, "You lying bastard!
You've been playing golf!"
=====
This Avon lady was out selling her wares. She got on an elevator and
pressed the button for the fifth floor. Suddenly, she let a fart. She
pine-scented air freshener out of her satchel and sprayed it all
The door to the elevator opened on the third floor and a rather
inebriated man gets on. The door closes and suddenly he gets a whiff
=====
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