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Subject: Religion
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Date: Wed, 25 Jun 2008 13:54:19 GMT
Xref: news.nzbot.com alt.fan.rolex:6854
Sister Mary and Sister Barbaera were driving along a country road when
the Devil appeared on the bonnet of their car and made menacing gestures.
"Quick," said SAister Mary, "show him your cross!"
Sister Barbara leaned out of the window and yelled, "Piss off, you
bastard! I'll kick you in the balls if you try that again! Don't mess
with me!.
The Popes doctor had told him that his celibacy was causing serious
health problems. The doctor recommended that the Pope had sex with a
woman or else he could die.
"OK, I'll do it,"he said, "but on 3 conditions. First she must be
Catholic. Second she must ive in the local parish, and third it must be
completely confidential."
As the doctor was leaving the room the Pope yelled, "and by the way
doctor, can you get me one with big tits?"
As the shop steward passed his local church, the large sign proclaimed,
"JESUS LIVES". Hurrying to the Union office he worriedly asked, "Does
this mean no more easter holidays?"
The crowd had gathered around Mary Magdalene, preparing to stone her.
Jeus held up his hand and said, "Whoever is without sin, let them cast
the first stone."
Out of the crowd came a rock. It hit Mary Magdalene on the head and
killed her. Jesus looked exaspeated and yelled, "Mother, sometimes you
just piss me off."
Sitting in the plane was a bishop and a young priest. The bishop was
doing a crossword. "Four letter word, exclusively female, ends in
UNT," he muttered to himself.
"Aunt" suggested the young priest.
"Oh" said the bishop, " have you got an eraser."
The white missionary was in big trouble. The tribal chief was very angry.
"My sister had a white baby last night and your're the only white man in
this area. You must die for this breach of tribal law."
"but chief!" said the missionary nervously, " I know it looks that way
but these things happen. For instance, see your flock of sheep over
there? can you see the black sheep? there is only one."
"Alright, alright" replied the chief, "I'll keep quiet if you do the
same."
Mercury.
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