| Getting Older.... |
EasyNews, UseNet made Ea .. |
| ::darkshadows:: (blood@thirsty.net) |
2008/04/07 09:12 |
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From: "::darkshadows::" <blood@thirsty.net>
Newsgroups: alt.fan.rolex
Subject: Getting Older....
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Date: Mon, 07 Apr 2008 15:12:37 GMT
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Getting Older....
* You're getting old when your wife gives up sex for Lent, and you
don't know till the 4th of July.
* It's hard to be nostalgic when you can't remember anything.
* Middle age is when you have stopped growing at both ends, and
have begun to grow in the middle.
* You know you're into middle age when you realize that caution is
the only thing you care to exercise.
* A man has reached middle age when he is cautioned to slow down
by his doctor instead of by the police.
* Don't worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older, it
will avoid you.
* Statistics show that at the age of seventy, there are five women
to every man. Isn't that the darnedest time for a guy to get those
odds?
* You're getting old when you wake up with that morning-after
feeling, and you didn't do anything the night before.
* At my age, "getting a little action" means I don't need to take
a laxative.
* The aging process could be slowed down if it had to work its way
through Congress.
* You're getting old when getting lucky means you find your car in
the parking lot.
* You're getting old when you're sitting in a rocker and you can't
get it started.
* By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he's too old
to go anywhere.
* Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty. But everything else
starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.
* The cardiologist's diet: if it tastes good, spit it out.
* There are three signs of old age. The first is your loss of
memory, the other two I forget....
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