Little Johnny came home from school one day and went by his mom's room. The door
was open, so he looked in and saw his mom lying on the bed naked moaning and
touching herself saying, "Ooh, I need a man! I need a man!"
The next day, Little Johnny got home from school and saw his mom lying on the
bed naked with a naked guy on top of her. So Little Johnny ran to his room,
stripped down naked, and started to touch himself, while moaning, "Ooh, I need a
bike! I need a bike!"
+++++
A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her
class by saying, "Everyone who thinks you're stupid, stand up!" After a few
seconds, Little Johnny stood up. The teacher said, "Do you think you're stupid,
Little Johnny?"
"No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!"
+++++
A father asked his son, Little Johnny, if he knew about the birds and the bees.
"I don't want to know!" Little Johnny said, exploding and bursting into tears.
Confused, his father asked Little Johnny what was wrong.
"Oh Pop," Johnny sobbed, "for me there was no Santa Claus at age six, no Easter
Bunny at seven, and no Tooth Fairy at eight. And if you're telling me now that
grown ups don't really have sex, I've got nothing left to believe in!"
+++++
One day, Little Susie got her monthly bleeding for the first time in her life.
Not quite certain what was happening, and somewhat frightened, she decided to
tell Little Johnny. Little Susie dropped her panties and showed Little Johnny
what was happening.
Little Johnny's eyes opened wide in amazement. "You know," he said, "I'm not a
doctor, but it looks like someone just ripped your balls off!"
+++++
Sam: Would you punish me for some thing i didn't do?
Teacher: no, of course not.
Sam: good, because i didn't do my homework
+++++
The kindergarten class had a homework assignment to find out about something
exciting and relate it to the class the next day. When the time came for the
little kids to give their reports, the teacher was calling on them one at a
time. She was reluctant to call upon little Johnnie, knowing that he sometimes
could be a bit crude. But eventually his turn came.
Little Johnnie walked up to the front of the class, and with a piece of chalk,
made a small white dot on the blackboard, then sat back down. Well the teacher
couldn't figure out what Johnnie had in mind for his report on something
exciting, so she asked him just what that was.
"It's a period" reported Johnnie.
"Well I can see that" she said. "but what is so exciting about a period."
"Damned if I know" said Johnnie, "but this morning my sister said she missed
one. Then Daddy had a heart attack, Mommy fainted and the man next door shot
himself."
+++++
There was a little boy named Johnny who used to hang out at the local corner
market. The owner didn't know what Johnny's problem was, but the boys would
constantly tease him. They would always comment that he was two bricks shy of a
load, or two pickles short of a barrel. To prove it, sometimes they would offer
Johnny his choice between a nickel (5 cents) and a dime (10 cents) and John
would always take the nickel ... they said, because it was bigger.
One day after Little Johnny grabbed the nickel, the store owner took him aside
and said "Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. They think you don't know
the dime is worth more than the nickel. Are you grabbing the nickel because it's
bigger, or what?"
Slowly, Little Johnny turned toward the store owner and a big grin appeared on
his face and he said, "Well, if I took the dime, they'd stop doing it, and so
far I have saved $20!"
+++++
Lil Stinker
"just havin' fun!"
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