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From: ::darkshadows::
Newsgroups: alt.fan.rolex
Subject: The Way Children See Things!
Date: Fri, 08 Sep 2006 19:30:36 -0500
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The Way Children See Things!
NUDITY
I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening
when a Woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She
was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my
5-year-old shout from the back seat, "Mom! That lady isn't wearing a
seat belt!
HONESTY
My son Zachary, 4, came screaming out of the bathroom to tell me he'd
dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. So I fished it out and threw it
in the garbage. Zachary stood there thinking for a moment, then ran to
my bathroom and came out with my toothbrush. He held it up and said
with a charming little smile, "We better throw this one out too then,
'cause it fell in the toilet a few days ago.
OPINIONS
On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a Note
from his mother. The note read, "The opinions expressed by this child
are not necessarily those of his parents."
KETCHUP
A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup to come out of the jar.
During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her 4-year-old
daughter to answer the phone. "It's the minister, ! Mommy," the child
said to her mother. Then she added, "Mommy can't come to the phone to
talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle."
MORE NUDITY
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's
locker room. When he ! was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with
ladies grabbing< /FONT> towels and running for cover. The little boy
watched in amazement and then asked, ! ! ! "What's the matter haven't
you ever seen a little boy before?"
ELDERLY
While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly
shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon
rounds. The various appliances of old age, particularly the canes,
walkers and wheelchairs, unfailingly intrigued her. One day I found
her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced
myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and
whispered, "The tooth fairy will never believe this!"
DRESS-UP
A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw
her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear
that suit." "And why not, darling?" "You know that it always gives you
a headache the next morning."
SCHOOL
A little girl had just finished her first week of school. "I'm just
wasting my time," she said to her mother. "I can't read, I can't write
and they won't let me talk!"
BIBLE
A little boy opened the big family bible. He was fascinated as he
fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the
Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an
old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages. "Mama, look what
I found", the boy called out." What have you got there, dear?" With
astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, "I think it's
Adam's underwear.
darkshadow
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