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From: camden88 <camden88@alt.fan.prettyboy>
Subject: Re: When a boy falls in love with you
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Date: 13 Jul 2011 02:19:07 GMT
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On Tue, 12 Jul 2011 20:52:57 -0400, Doc NP-f31 wrote:
> I hadn't seen Zack in a few years. He was eleven or so then and a
> chubby, quiet fellow. It usually took some time to draw him out of his
> shell, but it was worth it because he's an extremely intelligent and fun
> kid.
>
> Zack is 14 now and I saw him this past weekend, his family and mine
> spent the weekend together. The first thing he asked me when he saw me
> was about where my son was. I told him that my son was at the beach with
> his best friend. He was disappointed at first, but then he saw my new
> puppy, Olli, and was smitten. He asked if he could pet Olli and I said,
> 'Of course, you can hold him if you want.' I gave him Olli to hold and
> then said, 'Zack, this puberty thing is really working out for you.
> You've dropped some weight, put on some muscle and you are looking
> good!' It was true too, but the compliment really caused him to brighten
> considerably. From that moment on he was my constant companion.
>
> Paying attention to a boy can cause some remarkable things to happen.
> Boys like Zack, who are former tubbies, often still have self esteem
> problems. They are often shy and unused to attention. When they see
> someone who is genuinely interested in them as a person, well, that
> feeling is like crack for them. They can't get enough of it. Over the
> course of the weekend Zack came ALL the way out of his shell. He even
> stood up in front of a crowd and performed in a talent show. He admitted
> that it was a big step for him.
>
> When a boy begins to fall in love with you he will seek you out. His
> intent is to engage you so that you will be all about him. As boylovers,
> we are all about them anyway. So, invariably a boy who normally wouldn't
> put two sentences together in conversation with an adult will end up
> having long interesting conversations with the man who pays attention to
> him. So it was with Zack. Zack has a wonderful Dad who is active in his
> life, but a boy like Zack, and indeed most boys, truly benefit from a
> strong relationship with a man who is not their father. It gives them
> something to weigh against what they hear from their parents. The
> attention they receive, especially if it is positive attention, causes
> their self esteem to rocket upward.
>
> Both Zack and I continued our normal routines during our weekend
> together, but it always seemed like when I sat down from some errand I
> would soon find Zack at my side. Being sought out is a wonderful feeling
> for us as boylovers. There were many other Dads, boys, and people where
> we were that Zack knew well, but he stayed around me most of the time,
> as did many of the other boys, his little brothers included. I'm sure
> this has happens to most of you as well. You are a boy magnet. I can't
> explain it, it is the way we are. My ex-wife always said it was because
> I have an open face and personality. Maybe she's right, who knows?
>
> We talked about scouting, a passion of his. We talked about school,
> sports, girls, whatever came up. We could talk this way because he was
> comfortable around me in ways he isn't with his Dad. His Dad was often
> right there with us as Zack talked and acknowledged Zack's openness
> around me.
>
> In the end, we laughed shared many stories and revelled in each other's
> company. He shyly asked me if I had a Facebook account; I said that I
> did and asked him if he had one. He said, 'Not yet, but he'll be allowed
> to have one next month when he gets a new laptop.' He 'friended' me on
> his Mom's account yesterday. LOL! I was the emcee for the 'Talent Show'
> and encouraged him to get up and perform. He did, he put on sunglasses
> and read a list of the world's worst jokes from his iPhone in a
> completely deadpan delivery. Stephen Wright would have been proud. It
> was VERY funny.
>
> When we parted, he hugged me. He said, 'I never do this' and proceeded
> to give me an awkward 'Bro-hug' complete with back pat. I said, 'Try it
> this way', and gave him a warm bear hug. 'Your way is better,' he
> acknowledged.
>
> So, I gave him my time and attention. He got a boatload of self esteem,
> happy memories and the kind of attention he could get nowhere else. I
> watched him grow over three days. It was a beautiful sight.
>
> What did I get?
>
> I got to spend the weekend with a wonderful boy.
>
> Life is good.
>
> Doc NP-f31
>
> Your comments solicited.
Doc,
That was a touching story and Zack is very lucky to have met up with you
again this past weekend. It shows how just by virtue of the fact that we
care, we are able to make lasting positive impacts on the lives of boys
with very little effort. I hope you continue to do this important work
and enjoy the company of many more boys to come.
camden88
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