On 5 Jun 2010 00:35:01 -0500, " +Grant. " <+Grant@grant.grant> wrote:
>In article <b7gj06l2dtk8rbmjbl2hkm57sr6dqsctft@4ax.com>,
><victorvictorian@hushmail.com> wrote:
>
>> On Fri, 04 Jun 2010 21:13:46 -0400, NP-f31 wrote:
>>
>> >A BL friend wrote to me the other day about a date he recently had
>> >with a woman who is a nurse. She worked in palliative care and was
>> >talking about the death of one of her patients that had just occurred.
>> >As it turns out this patient had been a 12 year old terminally ill
>> >boy. The date had imbibed a few drinks and her tongue was loosened.
>> >She began to explain to my friend that she had granted the dying wish
>> >of this boy. He had, over a series of days, told her that the one
>> >thing he didn't want to do was die a virgin and that she was his only
>> >hope. She is an attractive woman, by the way. One day not long before
>> >he died she was assisting him in the shower and he implored her to
>> >touch him. She said she felt sorry for him, and she ended up making
>> >love to the boy and added that it was an enjoyable experience for the
>> >both of them. This really got the attention of my BL friend, it
>> >intrigued him to say the least. He told her that he wasn't judging her
>> >and that what she did was an unselfish act. Armed with that knowledge
>> >she admitted to my friend that this wasn't the first terminally ill
>> >adolescent she'd sent to heaven a man. Then she told him that she knew
>> >of many hospice nurses who had done the same thing. How many? She
>> >didn't say. This absolutely blew my friend's mind. He wondered what my
>> >feelings were on the subject and I told him. I'll share them with you
>> >too and I hope you'll share your feelings on the subject as well.
>> >
>> >Here is what I think:
>> >
>> >I think that nurses who have sex with terminally ill boys are
>> >fulfilling their own fantasies, not some boy's dying wish. Put the
>> >shoe on the other foot, if a male nurse had been asked the same
>> >question by a terminally ill 12 year old girl, the male nurse would
>> >be seen as a rapist, especially by the drunken nurse. She
>> >wanted those 12 year old boys for the same reason we, as BLs, would.
>> >She has convinced herself that she was fulfilling his final wish. What
>> >she really did was seduce and rape him. That's how it would be seen if
>> >we did it. I won't allow her to live in a double standard world. What
>> >if the boy had been gay? Would she have sought out a male nurse to
>> >service him? No, she was living out her fantasies and she's justified
>> >it in her mind because the kids were dying. What if either boy had
>> >made a miraculous recovery? What would she be then? A statutory
>> >rapist. Just because the boy dies doesn't make it okay. If you and I,
>> >as boylovers, have to go to jail for making love to a boy who wants us
>> >to, then she has to also. Otherwise, when is rape not a rape? When a
>> >woman does it? Tell that to Mary Kay Laterno. If the boy is dying?
>> >Well, that would lead to a rash of rape-murders, wouldn't it?
>> >
>> >I think this scenario shows the whole ingrained bias against man/boy
>> >relationships. I guarantee you if it were the other way around, man
>> >and girl, she would be horrified and so would her hospice boy rapist
>> >friends.
>> >
>> >Your thoughts solicited...
>> >
>> >Doc
>> >NP-f31
>>
>> My Dear Doc,
>>
>> I feel sorry for the young fellow. When one reaches that age, one
>> becomes acutely aware of being on the doorstep of manhood, with all of
>> the expectations one has heard from friends and family as to what
>> makes a "real man." If indeed the story was true, the lad had learned
>> he would be unfulfilled if he were to die a virgin. How preposterous,
>> of course, but very sad, don't you think?
>>
>> If the nurse felt she were "doing the lad a favour" by sending him to
>> heaven as a "real man," that is equally preposterous and equally
>> tragic.
>>
>> But if she acted to satisfy and confort him, then she is as an angel.
>>
>> To your argument. You state that nurses (presumably both men and
>> women) are fulfilling their own fantasies rather than the desire of
>> their younger partners. First, what should be so surprising or
>> objectionable about that? Second, if the younger partner makes such a
>> request and enjoys the experience, what should be so objectionable
>> about that? That a male nurse would be "seen as a rapist" is
>> precisely that ... SEEN ... by OTHERS, as a rapist ... completely
>> irrespective of the feelings of the younger partner. We are so
>> constrained by society, to such a great extent by gender roles. Men
>> are seen as predatory ... women as sympathetic and nurturing. There
>> have been cases, several of which I am certain you are familiar, where
>> a woman, most particularly a teacher, had been accused and convicted
>> of "rape" of a male student. Yet I hazard that these women do not
>> suffer near the punishment NOR the ostricisation that men do, because
>> of society's view of the nature of men and women.
>>
>> We are also constrained, perhaps unfairly and inaccurately, by
>> society's view of sex ... what the sexual feeling really is, who is
>> capable of feeling it and what it signifies, how a sexual act is
>> defined, and who may or may NOT engage in sexual acts. These rules
>> are less fundamental or, for that matter natural, than they are
>> arbitrary ... rules simply created by any society--groups of people
>> adhering to a traditional code of behaviour-- to organize and control
>> members of that society. So the idea that a grown woman and a young
>> boy or girl, or a grown man and the same, could not mutually enjoy
>> sexual contact, and that the younger partner would be fundamentally
>> scarred from the experience in all cases, is only substantiated in a
>> society that upholds that idea.
>>
>> Thus you state that the nurse "raped" him. Did she? How are you
>> defining rape, and from whence do you get the inspiration for that
>> definition, sir? You also state that, because a man engaging in a
>> similar act with a girl (or, for that matter, a boy) will invariably
>> be judged a rapist and sent to jail ... therefore so should the woman
>> be punished in like.
>>
>> I recall Ted's signature line here ... "An Unjust Law is Not Law."
>> Boylovers are subjected to the most heinous and draconian laws and
>> punishments for loving a boy. You would therefore subject women who
>> love boys or girls to the same injustice?
>>
>> And should this be overturned (which, of course, it will not) would
>> that lead to a rash of rape-murders? I think you overstate
>> considerably here, for emotion-stirring purposes. Of course not. It
>> is the law itself that has oft led to this terrible end. For Love
>> does not Murder the object of its desire. Hatred does.
>>
>> Lastly, you state that the scenario shows an ingrained bias against
>> man/boy relationships. Yes, in a sense, I suppose. But you know, all
>> our biases are learned ...
>>
>> A very wise doctor once told me, "Any LOVE is GOOD love." Let the two
>> of them be.
>>
>> With all due respect,
>>
>> VV
>> God Save the Queen!
>> God Bless the House of Windsor!
>> Rule Britannia!
>
>
>First to Doc a thank you for your post. Its something we need to know
>about and discuss. Its important. Please don't stop if you get some
>criticism for part of it. Its not personal but an important part of
>good discussion.
>
>Second, thank you VV for a great reply. There isn't anything in it I
>can disagree with and I wish I could write as well as you do.
>
>The important thing here is the boy asked first. Pleaded. Did she do it
>just because she lusted after him? Have you *seen* children who are
>dying? They are not pretty when they are not on camera in news stories.
>She took a big risk getting caught in the act or having the boy die in
>her naked arms. Did she do it for him or just for her? We don't know.
>She might not know either. I don't think it matters. The results count
>more than the motivation. I think she is a hero. She gave a dying boy
>what he pleaded for at great risk to herself and knowing she will have
>a dead lover to grieve over soon. If she enjoyed the sex thats a bonus
>but not as much as some would think, all things considered.
>I think boys in this very boring waiting to die situation just want sex
>any way they can get it. Its way better than TV. Manipulating the
>nurses with the "dying a virgin" act is just a ploy however true the
>dying part is. It looks like it works for them. It did for me (but I
>was an adult). How much do you want to bet the boys who are successful
>at this pass the word along to the other boys in the ward? Good for
>them!
>
>Extra note:
>It could be a surprise to some people but nurses (not all of course)
>have been having sex with patients since medical nurses were invented.
>We are sexual beings. That doesn't stop when we are stuck in a
>hospital. Nurses know this even if doctors don't want to that people
>heal better when they don't have sexual (abstinence) tension causing
>interference with the process. I personally can testify to this. LOL
>
>ps has anybody been reading my story posts?
Hey Grant!
Excellent post and an interesting perspective. You call to mind how
Garp was conceived. ;) So you think the boys were getting over on the
nurses? LOL!
Thanks!
Doc
NP-f31
PS- I've been reading your stories. Keep up the good work.
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