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From: " +Grant. " <+Grant@grant.grant>
Newsgroups: alt.fan.prettyboy
Subject: Re: +*+*+*+ Story Repost for IFB - "Zippo" +*+*+*+
Date: 27 May 2010 22:44:02 -0500
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In article
<0d877e0b-f3be-4694-b8ad-8cdf0584cff1@z13g2000prh.googlegroups.com>,
Ramiro Mazatan <ramiro.mazatan@gmail.com> wrote:
> ".........there either is or is not a way things are. The color of the
> day, the way it felt to be a child.......the feeling of saltwater on
> your
> sunburned legs......sometimes the water is yellow.....sometimes it's
> red........but what color it may be in memory..........depends on the
> day.
>
> ......i'm not going to tell the story the way that it happened......
>
> ...............i'm going to tell it the way I remember it...."
>
> Great Expectations...1999
>
>
> Chapter I: In The Beginning.......
>
> This all started when I was about 13 years old. My older sister Martha
> and her boyfriend Jake owned a CD shop in The City. We didn't make a
> lot
> of money, but we made enough to keep clothing on our backs and food on
> the table. All things considered I was pretty happy. My name is Seth.
> My
> parents had died about 5 years ago in a car accident coming home from
> a
> party at a friend's house. It was so sudden, and me being only 8 years
> old at the time, I took it pretty hard. I miss them terribly, but I am
> getting by now. My sister who was already in her 20s took care of me.
> Now
> 13 years old....black hair, blue eyes the color of the sky on a clear
> and
> beautiful day, with little brown freckles around my nose and cheeks.
> My
> sister was always telling me how much of a cutie I was, but god it's
> my
> sister. Some of the girls in school thought I was cute, but I just
> wasn't
> interested. Even though I showed no interest in girls, I didn't
> exactly
> catch a boner every time I thought a guy that was cute either. My
> sister
> said that I was late bloomer. She showed that she loved me and told me
> no
> matter what happened, her feelings wouldn`t change. She said that I
> would always be her little "ankle-bitter".
>
> Like I said I was pretty much indifferent to girls and guys....I just
> wanted to have fun. That was until the day that he walked in. It all
> started off innocently enough. When he walked into the shop with a few
> of
> his friends. I was just sweeping up when all of a sudden a squeaky
> voice
> just sort of said
>
> "....excuse me....".
>
> When I looked up it was like WHAM!!! His eyes caught a hold of me and
> wouldn't let me go. I just stared at him and couldn't take my eyes off
> of
> him. He was the most beautiful thing that I had ever seen. Green eyes,
> brown hair with kind of a reddish hue to it. Fair skin, nice full
> lips,
> and the cutest little button nose that you ever would have wanted to
> see.
> We just stared at each other for the longest time. I had never seen
> him
> before, but in that instance....I knew that I wanted to know him
> forever.
> One of his friends was laughing at a joke that must have been passed
> around amongst the others and just put his hands around his shoulder
> and
> ask him if he found out where the CD was. He called him Shane. His
> friend
> jarred him out of the daze, but I was hooked. All I could muster is to
> point my finger in a direction, I don't even know what CD they were
> looking for. But his friend pulled him away with him and they just
> kept
> talking and laughing while I just looked at him. From the first time
> since I saw him I finally got a chance to see his whole body. He
> looked
> to be about my age. Even though he had baggy clothes on you could see
> that he was slim by the way that the clothes hung off of his body. He
> was
> trying not to stare at me, but he kept on sneaking peaks back at me. I
> didn't have that problem, as I couldn't take my eyes off of him for
> one
> second. The rest of the store didn't get swept up because I only stood
> in
> one spot. I stared at him as he laughed at whatever his friends were
> laughing at. When they left, I was still floored by this kids beauty.
> I
> knew his name was Shane, and I was determined if anything to meet this
> kid. Hell I would have given my left foot just to know what kind of
> soap
> he used. I still had to do my work at the shop. I was scheduled to be
> there for another 3 hours. After I was done I decided that I would
> look
> around the neighborhood and see if I could find him or his friends. No
> such luck, I couldn't find him.
>
> Even though I wanted to see the guy again, I didn't. Life went on. I
> didn't think that my life was gonna end if I didn`t see him again.
> Even
> though he was hands down the most beautiful boy I have ever seen. But
> what could I do, the only thing that I knew about this kid was his
> first
> name. I wanted to see him again, but I guess fate had other plans, so
> I
> just chalked it up as a lose, and figured never to see this guy again.
>
> About a week and a half later I was working the CD shop on a Saturday
> while my sister stepped out to do some shopping. I had just finished
> ringing up a customer when all of a sudden in walked the kid....Shane,
> with about 4 other customers. I saw that he was sneaking peeks at me
> while pretending to look for some CD's. I figured that I was not gonna
> let this chance slip away. I was gonna meet him even if I was gonna
> make
> a fool of myself. I was the only one in the shop and decided that I
> would
> help the consumers out. I made a straight line over to Shane. Walking
> over to Shane I was so nervous. My palms were sweating and I was
> getting
> pretty warm under the collar. But it was now or never.
>
> "hi....."
>
> "hello..."
>
> "can I help you with something...?"
>
> "oh.....no.....I think I have it......" he said with a weak smile
> holding
> up a CD
>
> "Liza Maneli's Greatest Hits?" I smiled..
>
> "oh....no.....sorry..."
>
> He fidgeted as he nervously put the CD back on the rack to pick up the
> Limp Bizkut CD.
>
> "this one....." he smiled at me while he showed me the new CD.
>
> "my names' Seth..." as I stuck my hand out to shake his.
>
> "Shane...."
>
> I was shaking so bad I thought I would have shaken all of the loose
> change that he had in his pockets. His hand was so warm and soft. I
> almost melted right there. I just stared in his eyes and smiled. He
> did
> the same. Just then the phone rang. Waking me from my daydream. I ran
> to
> the front of the store to answer the phone. While I was talking Shane
> had
> left the store. I was disappointed that I had missed him leave, but on
> the register was a slip of paper that read...."nice to meet you
> Seth..."
>
> I just looked at the paper and smiled. Shane came back to the store a
> few
> more times. Each time we talked to each other a little more. I found
> out
> that he lived in the heart of the city. That he went to Bedford
> Academy.
> A prep school in the country. This school was known for it's members
> families being the richest in the whole country. Why he came downtown
> to
> slum it out with a poor kid like me I didn't know. I wanted it to be
> for
> obvious other reasons. I mean I knew that I liked Shane. He was
> gorgeous.
> But I was still not sure about what that meant for me. Whether I
> wanted
> to do something with him, or if I just wanted to be near him. I know
> that
> I was happier when he was around. That it felt good when he would
> laugh
> at something that I had said. But I still didn't know if I wanted
> something more. Over the course of time I guess that we started to get
> pretty familiar with each other. Not friends mind you, but I did
> notice
> that he started to come to the shop a lot more than he used to.
>
> Then one Friday while walking past a building, he was just coming home
> from school. He was in a uniform. We greeted each other and he asked
> me
> if I wanted to come up. I of course said yes even though I had to be
> to
> work at the shop in about a half hour. The door man greeted both me
> and
> him as he held the door for us to enter. On the ride up the elevator
> to
> his apartment, the conversation was casual. When we walked into the
> apartment, my jaw was floored. The only thing that I could say was
> wow.
> The place looked more like a museum than an apartment, and it was
> huge.
> He said that there were only two apartments to each floor. He lead me
> to
> his room and asked me if I wanted to look at TV, play some video
> games,
> or just listen to music. I opted the video game. He started the video
> game while he went to get changed into some more comfortable clothes.
> His
> uniform wasn't as baggy as his regular clothes. You could actually see
> his body. He had the cutest little butt. That put me a little on the
> defensive. Here the guy just invited me up to his place, and the only
> thing that I could do is check him out. I had to cool it. When he
> returned he was wearing a t-shirt and a pair of shorts. He had no hair
> on
> his legs and they looked firm. Not too muscular, but firm. I saw a
> little
> of his stomach as he was pulling his shirt down, just a tease of
> flesh,
> but enough to know that he didn't have any hair on his stomach. I was
> sitting on the floor just playing some fighting game. He could have
> sat
> on the bed or in one of the chairs in his room, but he sat down next
> to
> me on the floor. As we played the game you could tell that he was
> getting
> into it. Moving his body all around and getting closer to me with
> every
> movement and jerk of his body. Soon enough we were touching with every
> movement that we made with the game. After about 15 or so games we put
> the controllers down and just talked a little. You know the
> usual......school.....friends...parents. He told me about when his
> father
> died when he was 9 years old , and I told him about my parents. We
> both
> talked about how hard it was when his dad died, and my parents died.
>
> When he asked me if I had a girlfriend...I just looked down at the
> floor
> and said no. I looked up at him to return to question to him and meet
> his
> eyes. He just continued to look at me and shook his head no. We stared
> at
> each other for I don't know how long. There was no one there to stop
> us
> from staring at each other either. Just then my cell phone went off.
> As I
> answered it was my sister. She wanted to know where I was, since I was
> supposed to be at the shop about 20 minutes ago. She said that she had
> to
> go to the bank and buy some food for dinner tonight, and that Jake
> wouldn't be back from his job for about another hour. She wanted to
> get
> to the bank before it closed.
>
> ".........ummm.....I gotta get to work......."
>
> "okay, I will talk to you later."
>
> "Okay...see you later."
>
> "...Seth, do you want to come back by later maybe?"
>
> "Maybe...I will ask my sister if I can....call me later tonight."
>
> "It's a deal..."
>
> I collected my things and was on my way to the door. I almost knocked
> over a woman on my way out of the building. I muttered some type of
> apology and just kept going. To say the least that my mind was
> elsewhere
> was an understatement. On the home....I just thought. I mean I knew at
> this point that I liked Shane more than anyone that I had ever met in
> my
> entire life. But I was scared beyond anything that I had ever felt in
> my
> life. What did this mean? Was I gay? Did I want to have sex with him?
> I
> know that me and Shane didn't do anything, and I know that all we did
> was stare at each other, but it was weird. I know that I wanted to do
> more than stare at that moment. When we touched as we moved when we
> were
> playing the game. It was like electricity going through my body with
> each
> touch. I didn't exactly know what I was feeling, but I know that I
> wanted to do more than just touch him, but what, and more importantly,
> did he feel the same way? What would he think of me if he knew what I
> was
> thinking?
>
> I thought of doing something like that with a guy. I never even knew
> that
> I could feel that way about another person. But it is wrong to feel
> this
> way, right? I mean last month I remember a kid, named Greg got beat
> up.
> It was after school and a rumor had been going around the school that
> he
> had sucked off another kid during a basketball game. It was about 3
> guys
> that just beat that kid. I felt that it was wrong what they did, but
> didn't he deserve it??? Of course he didn't deserve it. But this image
> freaked me out. This is what I saw happening to me. The kids that did
> it
> were caught and charges were brought against them. The principal even
> called an assembly for the school. Telling everyone that that type of
> behavior would not be tolerated at his school. Not only would you be
> suspended, but charges would be filed against you. Even after all of
> that, the kid was called names and outcaste by everyone. He had his
> friends, and by what I saw, all of them didn't stick with him. The
> word
> "fag" was painted on his locker numerous times. He has been called
> every
> bad thing in the book. But the saddest thing about the whole situation
> is
> that it was only a rumor that started this whole thing, and it is
> still a
> rumor that hasn't been confirmed. It's unknown whether or not the kid
> actually did this. No one even knew if the kid was gay or not. Not
> that
> it really mattered anyway. No human being should be treated like that.
> I
> can't take that type of thing happening to me. Plus the fact that I
> wasn't ready for anything to happen. I mean I was so confused about
> what
> I was feeling.
>
> What next.....would we have sex.....and even if by some means we did
> do
> something with each other, what would we do? All this was just me
> thinking to myself. Because I didn't even know how he felt for me. I
> know that there was some interest on both of our parts. The looks that
> were given were made by both of us, not just me. I had no idea that it
> would be this hard. What would I do. I had to contain these feelings.
> Make them go away. I mean to feel this way about another boy is wrong
> right? I couldn't take being treated like Greg was. I couldn't take
> being beaten up. Especially since I knew that I had feeling for Shane.
> Plus think of how this would affect Martha. What would she think of
> having a "fag" for a little brother. Wanting to borrow her make-up and
> everything. Just what she needed, a little sister! I could hear her
> now...."mom and dad would have been so disappointed....." I couldn't
> do this to myself. I especially couldn't do this to her!
>
> By the time that I reached the CD shop, my sister was behind the
> counter
> and the part time employee, a local college student named Laura was at
> the store. She just tapped her wrist signaling that I was late. I went
> to
> the back to change when I just sat down and started to shake
> uncontrollably. Martha came in back to see why I was late when she saw
> me. She immediately came to my side and hugged me. Asking me what
> happened. I couldn't tell her anything. Me and my sister kept few
> secrets
> from each other, but I couldn't tell her this one. I told her that
> nothing was wrong, but she wouldn't let up. She could always tell when
> I
> was lying to her. I don't know how, but she could always tell. She
> just
> said okay. But at some point I would have to talk to her about what
> happened. She told me to go up stairs and get some rest. She and Laura
> could handle the shop until closing by themselves. I went straight to
> my
> room. I just lay on my bed and stared at the ceiling. What was going
> on.
> I couldn't figure it out. I thought that by me just getting out of
> there
> I would start to feel better, but that didn't help. I still felt like
> crap. I still had no idea of what to do. I don't know. What should I
> do?
>
> This is how me and Shane started out. We didn't discover that we loved
> each other and had mad passionate sex. It started out with us just
> staring at each other every chance we got. I was just a scared little
> boy. I didn't know if he liked me too. Not all little 13 year old boys
> want to hop in the sack with the first thing that comes along.
> Programmed
> by society to be a certain way....that if you don't follow the same
> path
> or practices that everyone else around you is following you should be
> an
> outcaste. Made an example of what happens to those that don't fit in
> with
> what the status quos is. Thinking that everyone that you love...your
> friends....family would disown you. Mock you. And in the most extreme
> cases (which happens a little too often for comfort) mame you. The
> fact
> that, at that age....even when we put up the facade that we don't need
> the approval of anyone to be what we want to be. That we can be
> individuals...not following a certain pattern.....that we are stronger
> than our parents were at our age. Being more aware of what is going on
> in
> the world today, and showing that we are dealing with it. That we can
> handle it......we still live our lives in fear....fear that if someone
> sees us and calls us out apart from everyone else....that they will
> call
> us freaks. Trying our hardest to live the fantasy lives that the music
> industry has made for us. We are not skinny enough, we don't have the
> right skin. My body is not defined enough. These aren't the right type
> of
> jeans to wear. Funny huh........to be continued
Please continue. I liked the story very much.
--
Grant
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