Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench
>> talking, and one blonde
>>
>> says to the other, 'Which do you think is
>> farther away... Florida or the moon?'
>>
>> The other blonde turns and says 'Helloooooooooo, can
>> you see Florida ?????'
>>
>>
>> CAR TROUBLE
>>
>> A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the
>> mechanic it died.
>>
>> After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling
>> smoothly.
>>
>> She says, 'What's the story?'
>>
>> He replies, 'Just crap in the carburetor'
>>
>> She asks, 'How often do I have to do that?'
>>
>>
>>
>> SPEEDING TICKET
>>
>> A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her
>> very nicely if he could see her license.
>>
>> She replied in a huff, 'I wish you guys would get your
>> act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and
>> then today you expect me to show it to you!'
>>
>>
>>
>> RIVER WALK
>>
>> There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a
>> river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank.
>> 'Yoo-hoo!' she shouts, 'How can I get to the
>> other side?'
>>
>> The second blonde looks up the river then down the
>> river and shouts back, 'You ARE on the other side.'
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> AT THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE
>>
>> A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office
>> and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it.
>>
>> 'Impossible!' says the doctor. 'Show
>> me.'
>>
>> The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left shoulder
>> and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed even
>> more. She pushed her knee and screamed;
>>
>> likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed. Everywhere she
>> touched made her scream.
>>
>> The doctor said, 'You're not really a redhead,
>> are you?
>>
>> 'Well, no' she said, 'I'm actually a
>> blonde.'
>>
>> 'I thought so,' the doctor said. 'Your
>> finger is broken.'
>>
>>
>>
>> KNITTING
>>
>> A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the
>> freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that
>> the blonde behind the wheel was knitting!
>>
>> Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights
>> and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on
>> his bullhorn and yelled, 'PULL OVER!'
>>
>> 'NO!' the blonde yelled back, 'IT'S A
>> SCARF!'
>>
>>
>>
>> BLONDE ON THE SUN
>>
>> A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one
>> day. The Russian said, 'We were the first in space!'
>>
>>
>> The American said, 'We were the first on the
>> moon!'
>>
>> The Blonde said, 'So what? We're going to be
>> the first on the sun!'
>>
>> The Russian and the American looked at each other and
>> shook their heads. 'You can't land on the sun, you
>> idiot! You'll burn up!' said the Russian.
>>
>> To which the Blonde replied, 'We're not stupid,
>> you know. We're going at night!'
>>
>>
>>
>> IN A VACUUM
>>
>> A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was
>> her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science
>> & Nature. Her question was, 'If you are in a vacuum
>> and someone calls your name, can you hear it?'
>>
>> She thought for a time and then asked, 'Is it on or
>> off?'
>>
>>
>>
>> FINALLY, THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES!
>>
>> A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired
>> two new dogs, and asked her what their names were. The
>> blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one
>> was named Timex. Her friend said, 'Whoever heard of
>> someone naming dogs like that?'
>>
>> 'HELLLOOOOOOO......,' answered the blond.
>> 'They're watch dogs!'
>
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