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From: "Group_Troll" <GroupTroll@Pissed.Off.nl>
Newsgroups: alt.binaries.chakotay
Subject: Re: Insert Subject Here
Date: 23 Feb 2010 22:02:01 -0600
Organization: Newscene Usenet News Service, http://www.newscene.com/
Lines: 133
Message-ID: <4b84a477$0$26245$bb4e3ad8@newscene.com>
References: <ovsvn512brqv7svp81eeoj03iu9pn6leit@4ax.com> <4b804284$0$209$bb4e3ad8@newscene.com> <8eh0o5tgfnmod1u2n4fa72110oevep9bek@4ax.com> <210220100401039772%Mover@Watch-Me.com> <4b817301$0$273$bb4e3ad8@newscene.com> <210220102031223085%Mover@Watch-Me.com> <p6k4o5pscil4le3he0vaj9s60v35scqjd0@4ax.com> <220220101715120758%Mover@Watch-Me.com>
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FROM: Mover <Mover@Watch-Me.com>
> In article <p6k4o5pscil4le3he0vaj9s60v35scqjd0@4ax.com>, Rebulon Ruster
> <reb.ruster@gmail.com> wrote:
>
>> On Sun, 21 Feb 2010 20:31:22 -0500, Mover <Mover@Watch-Me.com> wrote:
>>
>> The Care and Feeding of Your Troll: A Primer
>> ===========================
>>
>> So, you've brought home a new Internet Troll. Congratulations! If you
>> are a first timer having a troll, you may have questions. Here are a
>> few suggestions so that you and your troll can live in karmic balance.
>> Now remember, each troll is different and your results may vary.
>> However, this primer should help you get on your way. Welcome to the
>> world of having a troll!
>>
>> How do I refer to my troll now that I have him/her?
>>
>> First, your troll may show up already named. Yet, you will find the
>> ihateyou or yousuck. Never fear, you can always change their name. If
>> this is your first troll, I find that it is best to give him/her a
>> soothing, happy name to remind you that they are really just helpless,
>> sad creatures. A good name can make all the difference! I recommend
>> something like FluffyLoveBunny or Silly Billy Chickie Boo. How scary
>> is that? Not so much.
>>
>> So your troll has a name! Congratulations! You are on your way!
>>
>> How do I discipline my new troll?
>>
>> Now as trolls are known to do, yours may act up from time to time. He
>> or she may get down right nasty and vicious towards you. Remember:
>> That is in their nature. They are inbred to act that way. It is just
>> NOT their fault. (And rumor has it most of them were dropped on their
>> head often as tiny, baby trolls.) Of course, your first instinct as
>> you get used to your new troll is to lash out and want to punish them
>> for being so incorrigible. That would be your first mistake! It only
>> encourages their behavior. The best way to keep your little
>> FluffyBunnyLove in harmony with you and your home is to ignore him or
>> her. Unlike their human counterparts, neglect keeps trolls
>> temperamentally neutral. Allowing them to see your anger or pain at
>> their behavior merely encourages them to keep it up and makes them
>> raging mean. Neglect. Ignore. Restore (the balance). Those are the
>> keys to disciplining your new troll.
>>
>> Now that I have a new troll, what do I feed him?
>>
>> Like any wild animal, it is important to understand the indigenous
>> nature of their diet. Your new troll may try to convince you that the
>> best thing you can feed him is a diet of your anger, frustration and
>> away with anything they possibly can. It would be a mistake to listen
>> to them. Your anger, frustration and pain is their main source of
>> of ambivalence and ignorant bliss to maintain their puny stature. As
>> much as you want to punish him or her, remember that little
>> FluffyLoveBunny needs to be ignored after he or she comes home with
>> you. A steady diet of neglect will keep you living in harmony with
>> your new troll!
>>
>> Where do I keep my new troll?
>>
>> That is a great (and normal) question! As with any troll, he or she
>> will want to be front and center in your life. He or she will want
>> your never-ending attention at all times. It is their nature.
>> However, to live successfully with your new troll, you must remember
>> to keep him or her locked in a corner or sitting so far in the back of
>> the room that you forget her or she is there. Remember: Neglect
>> meant to be.
>>
>> What if my troll runs away from me and never returns? Does this mean
>> I failed as a troll owner?
>>
>> Absolutely not! In fact, just the opposite. If your troll gives up
>> in frustration and leaves you for another, that simply means you have
>> done a good job in the care and feeding of your troll. Pat yourself
>> on the back. You deserve it!
>>
>> However, remember this: The troll population is diverse and re-spawns
>> troll may follow you home. But, with this handy primer, you will be
>> ready for the care and feeding of your troll!
>>
>> Good luck with your new troll! May your journey be swift and
>> painless!
>>
>> ==You can always count on Americans to do the right thing - after
>> they've tried everything else.
>> Winston Churchill==
>
>
> Great post! You took my short exposition and ran a creative Marathon
> from it. Well done! Should it be included in the FAQ?
>
> But, what is a troll?
> I've seen some "on-topic" posters be more harassing and vicious to
> their own kind than any real troll ever was, and saw some real trolls
> actually be reasonable sometimes. There have been posters who said they
> were who they were not, and posters who didn't have a clue who they
> wanted to be. There were posters who denied doing the things they were
> doing in the posts that contained the denial, and many native English
> speaking posters who showed they couldn't read or write worth a
> ha'penny, and went off half cuckooed in all misdirections every chance
> they could. With all of that going on at the same time, how can we be
> sure of anyone being who we think they are? Or even sane, ourselves
> included?
>
> in this case there is one little thing you might want to consider on a
> day so dreary, while you're weak and weary, pondering on the nature of
> the troll knocking on our chamber door; do real trolls ever post
> through Newscene? Quoth this Usenet Maven, "Nevermore".
>
> Mover, the Troll Maven LOL
>
> ps
> To Poe or not to Poe, that was the question. I think it was nobler I
> did it. LOL
Yes sweetheart, when I post pictures I use a different service. And we
have had those times of bad inglesh and other good fighs/arguuments about
the pics being off topic.
While I sometimes troll you from outside, the fun way is to troll you
from within. I am one of the group in another group. But the twain shall
not meat.
May The Fort Stand Strong! But I - Group Troll - have the power to bring
it down. I know where the secret side door is.
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