In article <15ee9022ddb64a27a414824dc72a84c5@dizum.com>
naDo0Dga <BimboFace@wienerDoucherybucket.org> wrote:
>
> Note: This is the REAL ballot. Ignore the flood of fakes being posted via
> dizum. Some kook is trying to weasel out of *winning*, for fuck's sake.
>
> <snicker>
>
> VOTING RULES:
>
> 1. To be certain your ballot is counted, it must be crossposted to at
> least one of alt.fan.cyberchicken and AUK. The followup-to on this
> article is helpfully set to AUK.
>
> 2. Ballots from known, awarded kooks who have received recognition during
> 2016 may be discarded at the FNVWs' pleasure.
>
> 3. Ditto for suspected socks of such kooks. To be certain your ballot is
> counted, you should post it under your primary nym and have been using
> that nym for some time.
>
> 4. Ballots discovered to have forged poster identities and ballots
> submitted via anonymous remailer will NOT be counted.
>
> 5. Ballots are clearest if they're just replies to this article edited to
> add an X in one box for each award category. Abstention is allowed
> (leave all boxes empty). Two votes in a single award category may be
> ignored, or one chosen over the other by FNVW decree.
>
> 6. Ties will be broken arbitrarily by FNVW decree, and there is nothing
> the awarded kook can do about this but cry, whine, and stamp his feet,
> thus getting an early start on August's awards.
>
> <snicker>
>
> It's been an active month, with 12 distinct known and potential kooks
> up for awards in 19 categories, including perennial favorites dolf,
> murphy, and Fakey, plus a strong showing by the aforementioned Dizum
> Spammer (that seems to be his actual name):
>
> Dumbest Internet Klutz Hore Award:
> [X] kensi.
> [X] kensi.
>
> Pablo Picasso Blue Cube Award:
> [X] Fake PJR.
> [ ] a jaquzi. (sp?)
>
> Edmond Wollmann Memorial Rubber Turkey Award:
> [X] Stumpy Fingers
> [ ] Some pathetic loser hoping to make himself appear as awesome as his Usenet Lord and Master
> [ ] Boseph Jartlo
> [ ] Anything Obama wants I'm against.
> [ ] Alex Cain
>
> Nobel Peace Price Award:
> [ ] Disgusting beyond belief.
> [ ] TOSEM (Pie Gurl) PiG@yahoo.com WINNER - Kook of the Year 2012
> [X] Kensi and Nadegda
> [ ] Skin and Flint Finance Corporation, I. Fleecum, President.
> [ ] Polissar et al.
>
> Goofy Azzed Babboon Award:
> [ ] Scooter
> [ ] What a lubber calls a closet we seamen call a locker.
> [ ] a short pudgy uneducated cross-dressing antisocial unemployable mooching halfwit living in a dilapidated travel trailer and frequently conjugally visiting goat carcasses buried ass-up in the deep forest
> [ ] Stumpy Fingers
> [X] kensi.
> [ ] Kadaitcha Man
>
> Mitch Hedberg These Ants Don't Do Shit on Their Farm Award:
> [ ] What a lubber calls a ceiling we seamen call an overhead.
> [ ] Nadegda
> [X] kensi.
> [ ] Girl, 10, drugged before being raped, dismembered & set on fire by her own family members
> [ ] A Single, Solitary Dog Turd in a Hot Dog Bun
>
> Pullitzer Prize Award:
> [ ] Chimpy The Illiterate Ignorant Lying Walter Mitty Credit-Stealing Gay Queer Cum Guzzling Boner-Bouncing Slut
> [ ] Come in Rodney Slater on the saxophone
> [X] kensi.
>
> Lodestone Award:
> [ ] Chimpy The Illiterate Ignorant Lying Walter Mitty Credit-Stealing Gay Queer Cum Guzzling Boner-Bouncing Slut
> [ ] Pied Piper Of Penis
> [X] kensi.
> [ ] There's a website somewhere where you can send in a picture of it and have other people rate it.
>
> Jeff Daniels in 'Dumb and Dumber' Shitsplatz Award:
> [ ] William Malone Griffith, Jr.
> [X] kensi.
> [ ] I've archived it as one of the stupidest things Fakey's ever said
>
> William F. Buckley "Stop!" Award:
> [ ] I hate to burst your gay little bubble
> [ ] George Will
> [ ] One word: Checky.
> [X] kensi.
> [ ] Nagenda
> [ ] Got Faketard in hiding
>
> Carl Withers Ain't No Sunshine When They're Gone Award:
> [ ] Bill Jillians
> [X] kensi.
> [ ] Janithor's contributions during the Tetrarchy era
> [ ] 13332 Kids in a Suit
>
> Coward of the Month Award:
> [ ] A halfwit who can't figure out even basic geometry problems
> [ ] Blame the Flooder, KB9RQZ
> [X] kensi.
> [ ] "All for one!" "One for all!" "Every man for himself!"
>
> Order of the Holey Sockpuppet Award:
> [ ] your Usenet Lord and Master
> [ ] Stephen Thomas Troll
> [X] kensi.
> [ ] Smackdown on the Assworm and his gay pal, Checkmate.
>
> Ministry of Circle Jerks Award:
> [ ] Seamus
> [X] kensi.
> [ ] General Norman Schwarzkopf
> [ ] A Little Spankard Bitch
>
> 72 Raisins "Crackpot Religion" Award:
> [ ] I don't dare face my Usenet Lord and Master
> [ ] Joel Edge
> [X] kensi.
> [ ] Bill Jillians
>
> Balsa Gavel Award:
> [ ] Donald Trump
> [X] kensi.
> [ ] Sir Gargles Balls, Is Queer
> [ ] CastAlone aka heidi, aka Jane Doe*, aka kT*, aka lacy, aka lucy, aka mary, aka murphy, aka phlatArse, aka Pie Gurl*, aka Pixie, aka Priscilla aka news in service aka BBB
> [ ] Table manners aside
> [ ] Dink D. SisterFister
>
> Tinfoil Sombrero Award:
> [ ] A halfwit who can't figure out even basic geometry problems
> [X] kensi.
> [ ] bit rot
>
> Unabomber Surprise Award:
> [ ] We welcome Val Doonican as himself.
> [X] kensi.
> [ ] The real PJR would be too busy sucking Gary's dick to have time left to read or post to Usenet.
> [ ] Paul DarbyShire
> [ ] Paul Derbysnicker
>
> Kook of the Month Award:
> [ ] bit rot
> [X] kensi.
> [ ] Ashton Kutcher idiot
> [ ] Run like you always do
>
> John Wayne Gacy Let Me Paint Your Picture Award:
> [ ] Scooter
> [X] kensi.
> [ ] You took the bait, Guppy.
>
> Kooki Information Minister Award:
> [ ] What Ever happened to Web Based Mixmaster Interfaces? Most gone. Those that remain appear not to work. :(
> [X] kensi.
> [ ] bensi <bbensington01@qmail.invalid>
> [ ] Mop Jockey
> [ ] SPNAK! My Shiny Tinfoil Ass
> [ ] Gary Burnore
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